Don't Shop for Weapons, Roll for Them! Diagetic Rando Weapon Fun

Sometimes the shopping of session zero runs a bit long. This should speed things up. Everyone gets one weapon.This kinda stuff is good for RPGs where all weapons do the same damage or damage is based on class, &c.

 

Mage types (d10):

1. Cultist dagger
2. Staff
3. Caduceus
4. Imp (like a falcon)
5. Psychokinesis
6. Bad luck
7. Heavy tome
8. Pew pew wand
9. Just a gun
10. Sparkly fingers
    

Warrior types (d6):

1. Sword (d10):
   
1. Katana edgelord
   
2. Zweihander
3. Browdsowd
4. Gladius
5. Short sword
6. Falchion
7. Scimitar
8. Sabre
9. Cane sword
10. Double sword
2. Ax (d5)
   
1. Bearded
2. Throwing
3. Broadaxe
4. Sickle
5. Adze
   
3. Smasher (d10):
   
1. War hammer
2. Mace
3. Club
   
4. Morningstar 
5. Cudgel
6. Flail
7. Mitre
8. Crowbar
9. Quarterstaff
10. Nunchaku
    
4. Polearm (d5):
   
1. Poleaxe
2. Halberd
3. Pike
4. Scythe
5. Billhook
   
5. Brass knuckles
6. Spear (d6)
   
1. Trident
2. Bident
3. Pitchfork
   
4. Spear spear
5. Kung fu style
6. Javelin
   

Thief types (d10):

1. Dagger (d5):
   
1. Sax
2. Stiletto
   
3. Dirk
4. Main gauche & short sword
5. Kris
   
2. Blackjack
3. Blowgun
4. Garrote
5. Rapier
6. Flintlock
7. Ninja star
8. Straight razor
9. Crossbow 
10. Kabong
    

Priest types (d3):

1. As per warrior (roll on their table), but base your god on the weapon.
2. Whip
3. Giant Cross
   

Granola types (d8):

1. Falcon 
2. Bow
3. Doge
4. Longbow
5. Sling
6. Bola
7. Boomerang 
8. Spirits
   

I was promised rando gear too by the title, sir. Okay, I just pulled these out of my ass and axes, so there are a few bonus weapons sprinkled below too.

D12 additional gear (just roll for the starting player and then go down the list for subsequent players):

1. A dutch oven, a frypan, some garlic bulbs, a bedroll, a voodoo doll, a cane, 20’ hempen rope, reading lamp, and a dictionary.
2. A bedroll, an area guide complete with restaurant reviews, some small scissors, a comb, a long flute, and an ass.
3. A little, indentured servant; a book of fantastical voyage accounts; four small daggers; spidersilk cloak, and a nesting dolls set.
4. Mom’s sword, 10’ chain, a box of mummy-dust, a mirror, a bone-straw, a letter from a lost-love.
5. A wool cloak, a bedroll, straw shoes, flint and tinder, and a celt (stone ax).
6. Some incense cones (six aromas), a shaving blade, a large, straw hat, a felt mat, a book of sutras.
7. d3 holy statuettes, a whiskey flask, a jar of glow-worms, a walking-stick, a pamphlet of sensual-massage techniques, a hand-puppet, and a linen blanket.
8. A necklace of ears, white face-paint, three wigs, 20’ rope, a lantern, a handcart as long as a tall man.
9. A looking-glass, a book of constellations, a jar of space-slugs, a stiletto, a ruff, pantaloons, and a leather blanket.
10. A hand mirror, some prayer-beads, a treasure map, a giant wrench, thirteen porcelain dogs, 20’ rope, and two blankets.
11. A chess set, some bandages, a lamp, 20’ rope, a foppish hat, a shepherd's dog, and a chastity belt.
12. The bronze skull of Dungid-kin in a sack, a tattooing-kit, a wicker fish-trap, 20 feet of rope, a fleece.

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