GOZR gooz generator

the following is intended to be put into a bookmarklet. I… dunno how to do javascript things otherwise…

The bookmarklet: Make a Gooz (drag it to your bookmarks bar or make a new bookmark and copy the link from it, then edit it into your bookmark). You can test it just by clicking it here too.

It will generate a gooz PC for you. You’ll need James West’s GOZR to like, play the game. I really recommend you get the print version. 

Anyhoo, test it out, let me know if it works. If you wanna play GOZR, I am running it Fridays (U.S. time) on Discord, so.

If you wanna see the javascript, it's after the jump. 

 

javascript:(function(){function r(d){return Math.floor(Math.random()*d)+1;}function rollMoney(){const roll=r(6);if(roll===1)return{clinks:r(6)};if(roll===2)return{tossers:r(6)};if(roll===3)return{tossers:r(6)*2};if(roll===4)return{tossers:r(6)*3};if(roll===5)return{tossers:r(6)*4};if(roll===6){const firstRoll=rollMoney();const secondRoll=rollMoney();if(firstRoll.clinks&&secondRoll.clinks)return{clinks:firstRoll.clinks+secondRoll.clinks};if(firstRoll.tossers&&secondRoll.tossers)return{tossers:firstRoll.tossers+secondRoll.tossers};return[firstRoll,secondRoll];}}function formatMoney(money){if(money.clinks)return`${money.clinks} clinks`;if(money.tossers)return`${money.tossers} tossers`;return money.map(m=>formatMoney(m)).join(", ");}const a=[8,10,14],c=a.splice(r(3)-1,1)[0],m=a.splice(r(2)-1,1)[0],p=a[0],h=[15,16,17,18,19,20][r(6)-1],ar=r(6),d=ar<=3?0:ar<=5?1:2,arT=ar<=3?"None":ar<=5?"Light Armor (+1 Defense)":"Light Armor + Shield (+2 Defense)",sh=ar===6?"Yes":"No",hl=r(6)<=3?"No":"Yes",g=5,w=["Dirk (1d4+1)","Flamberge (1d6+1)","Nasty Flail (2d4)","Falx (2d4)","Bad Axe (1d6+1)","Butterfly Knife (1d4)","Pistol (2d4, 6 shots)","Bow (1d4+1, 18 arrows)","Barb Whip (1d4)","Balderdasher (2d6+2, 2 shots)"][r(10)-1],$=formatMoney(rollMoney()),b=["Red","Green","Blue","Purple","Orange","Yellow"][r(6)-1],s=["Olive","Umber","Plum","Gray","Teal","Silver","Lavender","Eggshell","Gold","Maroon","Coral","Pink"],k=s[r(12)-1],e=s[r(12)-1],y=["She/Her","He/Him","They/Them","Something else"][r(4)-1],t=["None","Short","Mohawk","Curly","Straight","Flowing","Animated","Crested","Long","Thin","Big","Spiked","None","Short","Mohawk","Curly","Straight","Flowing","Animated","Crested"][r(20)-1],l=["Eye Beam","Agile","Magic Power","Slayer","3rd Eye","Alchemy","Hawkeye","Mech","Psionic","Sneak","Extra Arm","Willpower","Hexer","Fool","Strong","Learned","Nature","Cutie","Tough","Arcane Luck"][r(20)-1],u=["Tree","Apple","Skull","Clover","Star","Mug","Sun","Blade","Bird","Cat","Fire","Wolf","Rat","Moon","Storm","Wyrm","Knot","Flower","Jewel","Fish"][r(20)-1],o=["Vermin Catcher","Teacher","Nurse","Guard","Burglar","Vendor","Glassblower","Metalworker","Gambler","Huckster","Fortuneteller","Leathermaster","Potter","Preacher","Lawdoer","Brewer","Bard","Waiter","Fisher","Builder","Winemaker","Sailor","Soldier","Animal Trainer","Fashioneer","Foodmaker","Hunter","Word Worrier","Armorer","Woodworker","Wyverner","Beggar","Living Statue","Keymaster","Astrologer","Joke Teller"][r(36)-1],n=["Body wrap","Crude loincloth","Noisy outfit","Funny hat","Cloak + hood","Crazy costume","Silken garment","Nice boots","Fur coat","Skirt","Plaid pants","Thong","Tattered","Leather jacket","Fancy pants","Gloves","Robe","Bandana","Denim","Rags"][r(20)-1],v=["Oil flask","10 iron spikes","Hammer","Magnet","Leather pants","Pointy hat","Bronze knife","Bullets","Diamond","3d6 tossers","Heroic figurine","Jar of marbles","Sack of rice","Shot horn","4 darts","Eye of newt","Feathered cap","Fine wine","Tooth necklace","Toy soldiers","Awesome belt","Bucket of lard","Blanket","Wrench","Healing balm","Rope","Grappling hook","Crow bar","6d6 clinks","Gourd","Chain","Jug of moonshine","Machete","Cult symbol","Shrunken head","Spring water","Weird sphere","Slime","Jerky","Animal mask","Ship in bottle","Orange imp","Sack of salt","Rucksack","Blowgun","Pyramid puzzle","Dragon scales","Glue","Bronze shield","Spiked gloves","Hard candy","Silver bullets","Orichalc Lamp","Fruit","Brass knuckles","Tent","Climbing gear","Lockpick kit","Lock + key","Bird","Silver dagger","Spiral horn"],i=[];while(i.length<3){const item=v[r(88)-1];if(item&&!i.includes(item))i.push(item);}const q=["Rounds","Pointies","Squares","Droopies","Petals","Tubes","Benders","Piggies","Rounds","Pointies"][r(10)-1],x=r(6),z=x<=2?"none":x<=4?"Regular buckle":"Special buckle",A=z==="Special buckle"?["3 Lucky rolls/day","Transform into symbol 1/day","Invisibility 1/day","Talking buckle","Buckle attacks once (1d6 dmg)","Ability related to symbol"][r(6)-1]:"";const buckleSymbol=z!=="none"?["Wolf","Latasor","Axe","Daisy","Angry face","Wizard","Sparrow","Rat","Bear","Sloth","Crone","Rose","Grinning face","Spider","Ram","Demon","Sword","Cross-bones","Worm","Sky wyrm"][r(20)-1]:"";const armorTypes=["Large scales","Turtle shells","Old coins","Brass rings","Leather bands","Bronze chains","Orichalc plates*","Silver discs","Hard straps","Hodge podge","Ironwood","Rusty rings","Polymer form","Tin lids","Glittering plates*","Chitin mail","Resin form","Chain links","Root mail","Meteorite*"][r(20)-1];const scar=["Over the eye","On the nose","Cheek gash","Half an ear","Forearm","Hand","Chin mark","Necklace","Cranium","Chest line","In the belly","Thigh","Foot lesion","Shoulder","Kneecapper","Bicep","Forehead","Wrist ring","Shin shocker","Lost finger"][r(20)-1];const streetNames=["Loopy","Dirt","Broken","Sandy","Better","Cobblestone","Higher","Lowdown","Middling","Jitter","Sore","Death","Choco","Goody","Nother","Old","Crooked","Bladder","Chum","Barter","God","Devil","Pistol","Prayer","Butter","Hope","Roboto","Magma","Dicey","Rum","Sugar","Thunder","Whiskey","Oink","Smoke","Salty"][r(36)-1];const streetSuffix=["Street","Avenue","Lane","Canal","Trail","Boulevard","Way"][r(7)-1];const names=["Woolf","Zigurd","Tobe","Lokar","Zizurelle","Plato","Moonbeam","Crunchy","Moktala","Cruz","Brop","Nijhfrid","Xigusu","Aju","Mukhiv","Jiri","Kati","Cratuio","Vol","Bix","Num","Lin","Put","Kem","Zin","Roc","Butter","Hham","Tumbonnet","Jammy","Blade","Ixmoor","Valerina","Coozmire","Camshoo","Yak","Drill","Qed","Rath","Panda","Yinny","Halo","Burril","Burro","Finus","Wakun","Vurrkal","Vaxkor","Trundar","Bandar","Flundarr","Jak","Binz","Allinda","Fig","Date","Pit","Murren","Kitty","Blanche","Igor","Zug","Dimlet","Weasel"];const name=names[r(names.length)-1];const deeds=["Lost a great treasure","Died","Born twice","Convinced wise gooz of a huge lie","Lifted a horse","Forgot a powerful secret","Fell in love","Mad a potent brew","Touched a god","Stole an idol","Wrote a book that got press","Spit in the face of a wizard","Activated an ancient device","Defused bomb","Unseated tyrant","Insulted rich oligarch and stole their pet cat","Lead revolt","Used to be a robot but not for long","Saved your enemy’s life","Visited the moon","Had 2 part vision (part 1 came true)","Escaped prison","Built better mousetrap","Fed a starving village","Ran for public office (twice)","Survived an undead attack","Communed with ghost of pretty one","Negotiated hostage release","Built school","Unearthed important ruin","Carried the day","Lost a war","Braved a frozen waste on a sled","Won a big race","Launched your own brand of hooch","Regretted a party","Amazed a magistrate","Rotted in hell and kind of loved it","Raged against a machine","Knitted a fine coat","Shot a gooz for snoring","Ratted out mob boss","Baked giant goozer pie","Composed epic symphony","Fell off high tower","Slept 1d100 days","Wrote blistering review of popular restaurant","Won award, did not earn it","Faded away, came back","Wrestled sky worm","Slapped witch","Blazed trail","Climbed tower","Found a god","Traveled in time","Lost it all","Crash landed","Won a trip","Tasted glory","Rode lightning","Tasted a rainbow","Dug deep hole","Ate a robot","Raised wolves","Lived in cave","Married robot","Lead rebellion","Sat on a throne","Moved heaven","Fled war","Rained hell","Helped elderly","Grew a tree","Used weird toilet","Spoke with a god","Got famous","Created","Fixed hunger","Glued talisman","Accidentally a riot","Bit a dog","Ruled bugs","Burned bridge","Made bank","Coked dino","Rode dino","Verily swooned","Found strange key","Climbed tallest tree","Used to have wings","Survived poisoning","Spilled the tea","Fixed broken artifact","Rage quite life","Solved for “x”","Visited another planet","Argued about free will","Shut gate to space","Dealt with 98 problems","Journeyed to the center of the planet, still know the way"];const needs=["Learn to sing","Feed the hungry","Kiss a god","Burn idols","Steal a treasure","Slay a giant","Build a house","Defeat a wizard","Explore a ruin","Remove a curse","Find bliss","Depose the bastard","Free an enemy","Capture a devil","Raze a temple","Cut your hair","Grow a beard","Find a spell of life","Never die","Kill a murderer","Run marathon","Become immune to poison","Go to hell","Start business","Ruin business","Tell best joke ever","Find self","Stop crime","Be a painter","Steal from the rich","Become a hero to the people","Ask the big question to the gods","Go to space","Write the best poetry","Find the love of your life","Take down a brutal oligarch","Start your own cult","Wrestle a gorilla","Build a robot","Die then rise again","Time travel","Be better","Find orichalc","Be a drummer","Change hair","Be humble","Go home","Win a war","Eat best eggs","Translate book","Be a pirate","Build shrine","Visit queen","Make cakes","Save friend","Restore a building","Fly a ship","Visit the moon","Hunt a band of slavers and kill them","Swindle a rich bastard","Commission a wicked device","Build a tower","Topple a tower","Become cyborg","Defy power","Breathe water","Learn language","Lead gang","Swim river","Amass wealth","Stop end of world","Stop time","Find peace","Become animal","Sleep a lot","Destroy cult","Find rare flower","Forge money","Find lost family","Join a cult","Free slaves","Find pickles","Save lives","Love","Travel","Commune","Grow","Fly","Lie","Read","Skate","Eat rocks","Live fast","Cruise","Dance","Party","Chill out","Get ripped","Base jump","Brew beer"];const deed=deeds[r(100)-1];const need=needs[r(100)-1];const output=`GOOZ CHARACTER:\n- Name: ${name}\n- Action Classes: Cunning ${c}, Magic ${m}, Prowess ${p}\n- HP: ${h}\n- Defense: ${d} (${arT}${ar>3?` (${armorTypes})`:""}, Shield: ${sh}, Helm: ${hl})\n- GOOZ: ${g}\n- Weapon: ${w}\n- Money: ${$}\n- Blood: ${b}\n- Skin/Hair/Eyes: ${s[r(12)-1]} skin, ${s[r(12)-1]} hair, ${s[r(12)-1]} eyes\n- Pronouns: ${y}\n- Hair: ${t}\n- Talent: ${l}\n- Lucky Symbol: ${u}\n- Background: ${o}\n- Other Attire: ${n}\n- Other Possessions: ${i.join(", ")}\n- Ears: ${q}\n- Belt Buckle: ${z}${z!=="none"?` (Symbol: ${buckleSymbol})`:""}${A?`\n - Special Property: ${A}`:""}\n- Wanna scar? ${scar}\n- Lives on: ${streetNames} ${streetSuffix}\n\n- Deed: ${deed}\n- Needs: ${need}\n\nYou may re-arrange your ACs to taste.\nThen decide if you are a wizard (p30)\nor if you want to level up instead (p12).\nIf you aren't a wizard,\nroll a d6 to see if you know a vulgar spell.`;const win=window.open("","_blank","width=500,height=500");win.document.write(`

${output}

`);})();

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